#13 Garden Gnome Liberationists

Garden Gnome Liberationists (GGLs). Are you f@%$ing serious?

Apparently.

These "individuals" advocate the "freedom" of garden gnomes. Often times, GGLs will steal our beloved, friendly, bearded (see post #12 for more on facial hair) gnomes and move them to new locations.

Freedom? Bitch please. They're ceramic.

I guess we can all thank Travelocity for their creative advertising the next time one of our pointed-hat donning friends is plucked from his peaceful perch under the Bird Bath, next to the pink, plastic flamingo under the watchful eye of the Lawn Jockey, who just so happens to be admiring his bad self in the Mirrored Yard Globe.

#12 Facial Hair

So, what it be?  Five-O'clock shadow? Fumanchu?  Handlebars?  Pornstache?  Goatee?  Chops?  Flavor saver? Half-and-half?

Who cares.   All we know is that it happens.   And if it isn't managed, it can become downright unrully.

Here's a chart to figure out which facial hair-scaping might look best on you:

Our friends at Wikipedia say that males should have fully developed facial hair by their early 20s. Looks like I'm behind that curve.

#11 Euromotion

Zee sounds of zee Euromotion. It doesn't get much better. Euromotion is a Portland, OR-based, five-piece electro rock band. Skeeter, the band's lead vocalist, claims to come from the year 3012. According to the band's website: "Euromotion is the essence of dance...We play dance music and pump parties all across the space-time continuum. We want to make party at your house."

FKNA right they do! Just remember, zee dancefloor pays zee ultimate price.

Here's a look at their music video for 'Get Serious'....

#10 The Naked Mole Rat

Jesus.

The Naked Mole Rat. There it is. Anyone ever in doubt of the relevance of the statement a picture is worth a thousand words should take a look at this beast.

Fantastic Notes:

• The Naked Mole Rat is also known as a Sand Puppy.

• It is unique among mammals in that it is virtually cold blooded.

• When Naked Mole Rats are exposed to acid, they feel no pain due to the fact that they have no neurotransmitters in their outer skin.

• It slightly resembles a penis.
  

#9 Randomness

It's been a while since a Wiki-Wha post has been done. We were sitting around the table this morning, randomly, and had a collective random thought of, "how random would it be to post on Wiki-Wha today?" Pretty random, right?

According to our friends over at the mothership, "Randomness is a lack of order, purpose, cause, or predictability. A random process is a repeating process whose outcomes follow no describable deterministic pattern, but follow a probability distribution." Like roulette, where he ball can be used as a source of apparent randomness, because its behavior is very sensitive to the initial conditions. Word.